Raine

I'm suddenly having thoughts of Raine. They say I have her smile. I remind them of her. But I'm just me, a reminder of her.

Beautiful, perfect Raine. In my eyes she was everything. Freckles and all. Though maybe she loved too much.

Raine swinging me up in the air. Days spent in total abandon. Laughters mingling together. Running around fields of gold in Tabon-tabon.

Then, calachuchis... In the end, was it worth the living and the loving? Or the color tangerine? I know I promised her birds of paradise, even storms and thunder.

I'm having thoughts of Raine. Pens, tongues, papers-- they wont be enough, but I can bring her back by just closing my eyes.

They say I'm like her. I blink, I'm unsure. My world crumbles every now and then, but everyday I try. I try to be like Raine.


Tomorrow is my Mom's 18th death anniversary. I was in my teens when she passed away. I used to doodle or scribble something about her to deal with it. This was one of those scribblings which I found in, where else, but the journal I gave to A many many years back.